Inspiring Passion & Purpose – Advice For Singles by Lorraine and Richard Platt
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists/ Relationship Development Experts
6 Steps to Creating an Inspiring Relationship

1. Get Clear.  How would it be if you had the perfect relationship? What would that person be like? How would you feel in their presence? Then write down exactly what you want and how you would feel if you got it. You can either make a list or a target with the most important features in the center.

2. Accept nothing less than what you want.  This declares to the world that you’re ready for a new kind of lover. It states that you are fully appreciating yourself and will accept no less from your partner. This means being willing to be alone in order to give yourself the space to create something new.

3. Release anything in your way.  Most of us have misconceptions and unresolved experiences that impair our ability to create the relationship we want. These issues make it difficult to see clearly and know how to proceed. Sometimes supportive friends and our best efforts and are not enough. An expert guide can help you resolve these issues and make the process easier.

4. Have the life you want right now.  Review your desire list and decide to provide these things for yourself. For example, if you are looking for someone who listens and understands, turn to a friend you trust. Be out in the world doing the things you would love to do. Create the richness you wish to experience when you’re with that special someone; i.e. dancing, biking, traveling, etc.

5. Reign In Your Horses.  Sex does not equal love. Desperation to have sex, or the act itself, can make you temporarily not care if the person meets your requirements. It takes time to know and trust someone. So, take your time! Have a dating plan that supports this. Be honest with yourself about what you need in order to be intimate.

6. Get Support.  Eliminate anything or anyone that feeds your negative beliefs about yourself, the opposite sex, or relationships. Find people who have and support healthy relationships. Surround yourself with friends, books, affirmations, etc.; basically anything that supports your goal.

We wish you success and happiness in creating an inspiring relationship. Just reading these steps however, can be like reading about how to play tennis. It is good information, but you improve your skill through practice. Of course, players who want to learn quickly and easily hire a coach. We invite you to give yourself this life-changing support.

Lorraine and Richard founded Passion & Purpose, a joint practice committed to helping singles and couples create inspiring relationships. Visit www.passionpurpose.org or call 415-302-1700.